Finance For Non-Financial Managers - Global Financial Systems

 A NAMIBIAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You make biltong...

 AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
 * You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

 A SOUTH AFRICAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You go on strike because you want three cows.
 * They get stolen, so you blame the previous regime' and steal someone
else's cows and shoot their owner.

 A ZIMBABWEAN CORPORATION
 * A farmer has two cows.
 * You take over his farm, eat both cows and wait for the international
community to supply more.

 A JAPANESE CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You re-design them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow
and produce twenty times the milk.
 * You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market
them World-Wide.

 A GERMAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month,
and milk themselves.

 A BRITISH CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * Both are mad.

 AN INDIAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You pray to them for food.

 AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
 * You break for lunch.

 A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You count them and learn you have five cows.
 * You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
 * You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
 * You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

 A SWISS CORPORATION
 * You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
 * You charge others for storing them.

 A CHINESE CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * You have 300 people milking them.
 * You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the
newsman who reported the numbers.

 AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
 * You have two cows.
 * The one on the left is kinda cute...