A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.

You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother, from Toronto , Mary, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second Mom, from Montreal Ann: "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He turned to the third Mom, Joyce from BC: "Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy."

At this point, the fourth mother, from Newfoundland , Carol, quietly got up, took her little boy by the hand, and whispered, "Come on, Dick, this guy has no idea what he's talking about. Let's pick up Peter and Willy from school and get dinner."

My Vacation In Beijing

A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious. She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed. Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English……….

Getting There: 
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lakeshore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.

The Hotel: 
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with himself.

The Restaurant: 
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.

Your Room: 
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.

Bed:
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.

Above all: 
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it."

THE 'Y' CHROMOSOME
People born before 1946 are called - The Greatest Generation.

People born between 1946 and 1964 are called -The Baby Boomers.

People born between 1965 and 1989 are called -Generation X.

And people born between 1990 and 2010 are called -Generation Y.

Why do we call the last group -Generation Y ?

Y should I get a job?

Y should I leave home and find my own place?

Y should I get a car when I can borrow yours?

Y should I clean my room?

Y should I wash and iron my own clothes?

Y should I buy any food?


Just thought you might want to know "Y"